Questioner (usually someone looking for a topic of conversation): How is your book doing?
Me (in my normal state of baffled-but-pleased-someone-is-talking-to-me): Oh, not too badly. A bit sticky in places though.
Q: Really? What, like with jam?
M: Well, with ideas, mostly. I've got a really difficult plot point 3,000 years ago.
Q: But it's already out, isn't it?
M: Er. (slowly) What does the cover look like?
Q: You don't know what the cover of your own book looks like?
And then I go for a bit of a lie down. I have no idea how authors who have three or four books out every year get on - they probably just say "fine," whenever they're asked how the book is doing, just on general principle. Anyway. This being a Bank Holiday weekend, and half term and everything, I am off to do a bit of Bronze Age research, only not the uncomfortable, living-without-pants, sort of research, no. I rather thought I'd wander wistfully around some Bronze Age sites, pat some stones, gaze into the distance whilst saying 'of course, this would all have been covered in trees, you know' and then find a really nice tea shop for a sit down and a cake.
And worry about what that 'thing' bobbing around in the pond actually is..
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